Scribe Report by Jack Wow
That will teach me to relax at the beginning of a run while MENTAL DISORDER prowls the site looking for his next victim. He likes to find his volunteers in a crowd, makes it very tough to say no. Later, he used this clever tactic when he took a vote and asked all those that disagreed with supporting a cause for abused children to raise their hands. Obviously to be an effective leader, you have to know how to properly load the question!!
Anyway, we were promised a good run by POLE DANCER and his lovely wife, TOM BOY, and they brilliantly came through with a fun run. It was perfectly marked for both runners and walkers. It had a little of everything, water, jungle shiggy, water, hills, water, plenty of flat for the long legged runners, water, pineapple fields and of course, water. It was a great run with plenty of thought given to enhance our experience UNTIL the end beer stop. Who in their right mind offers Chang beer as a reward for the completion of a fine run. You’d think POLE DANCER would have learned from the last time, but NOOO! From a great run it went down hill from there, the On In was confusing and poorly marked. I guess that’s what happens when you drink your own Chang beer.
Before the circle festivities got started, we were treated to a VV sausage barbecue. It was outstanding and quickly sold out. On a side note, as I was watching Hashers munch on sausage sandwiches, I was mystified by a human “Glow Stick” standing there with a beer hanging around his neck. He was the whitest white guy I’ve ever seen in Thailand! He wasn’t even pink from the sun! Someone whispered to me that it was FERRY QUEEN and due to his massive amounts of Chang beer consumption he was immune from burning…go figure!
Now some business, MENTAL DISORDER advised us that one of our On On bars, Nicky’s Bar, asked if we’d help out with a worthy cause by supporting a charity function for abused children in Thailand. He called for a vote of all members present to authorize the spending of 8,000 baht for a clown act at the event. The vote appeared to be unanimous, but MENTAL DISORDER still asked anyone who opposed to helping abused children to raise their hand and, HaHa, no one did…such a smart GM, like I previously said, it’s all in knowing how to ask the question!!
The big winner of the night was DUCHESS TADPOLE, who not only received her 500 Run personal chair, but also walked away with the giant soaker gun from FREE WILLY‘s Raffle and just in time for you know what next week. She’ll be properly armed you can be assured!!
Another highlight of the evening was the presentation of the newly designed PH3 T-shirt. Believe me, it is a winner…kudos to the design team. It was modeled by 2 Harriette’s and SCAR W/2TS, who was voted the prettiest!! There’s that Chang beer at work again I suppose.
There were a couple of administrative details, one being the final naming of a (un)fortunate fellow by RA, EMPEROR AIRHEAD. The fortunate was touted as the chief engineer of a German TV network who handled the world cup broadcast in Brazil. Well after this big build up, he walked away with the moniker of “NOT SO STUPID KRAUT KUNT” No worries, I’m was confused too, but he appeared to be happy!! Another Chang beer victim!!
There were two virgins present, Shawn from London and Travis from, as he initially said it, “Canadia“. Must have been Chang at work again!
Towards the end of the evening we were entertained by the “Hash Dogs Dirt Band”and their gyrating Harriettes. It was kind of like old Rock’n’Roll meets the Robert Palmer girls!! They were thrilling, the crowd went Chang wild!!
Finally, MENTAL DISORDER closed the evening with an oh so familiar song and the promise that next week’s hash would be handled by “THE BELGIANS“
Yea, they hate Chang beer!
On-On! Jack Wow
Next week’s scribe is to be announced
Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.
Total Runners This Week – 87
Hashers Present Last Week – 59
15 ARSE BANDIT; 31 ARSE VAN HOLE; 601 BALL RINGER; 383 BELL END; 121 BEN 10; 106 BURL IVES; 26 CHICKEN DUNDEE; 104 CRAPPER; 87 DIRT LOONEY; 1394 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 52 FERRY QUEEN; 172 FLYING FINN; 629 G.I. JOE; 14 GADDAFI’S BRIDE; 8 GADDAFI’S HUSBAND; 293 GANGREEN; 10 GIGGLE TITS; 95 GOLDEN RIVET; 35 HARBOR WHORE; 8 INIBRIO; 7 JACK WOW; 695 LADY FLIPPER; 338 LIBERACE; 429 LONE WOLF; 127 LOST CAUSE; 23 MAYO QUEEN; 181 MENTAL DISORDER; 104 MISS USE ME; 12 MR GIGGLE SHIT; 743 MRS. HEAD; 211 NO MORE CUM; 5 NOT SO STUPID KRAUT KUNT; 164 OBEWAN; 401 ODD-JOB; 355 PELER; 47 PHANTOM; 28 PINK DOLPHIN; 67 POCKET SOCKET; 41 POL DANCER; 42 POLE FUCKER; 84 PRINCESS BUM BOY; 13 REAL OLD; 256 SCAR W/2TS; 690 SIR ARSE-A-HOLIC; 717 SIR FREE WILLY; 879 SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD; 75 STREET CLEANER; 225 STUPID KRAUT KUNT; 435 TAMPAX; 52 TELLY TUBBY; 39 THE WIZARD; 221 TOM BOY; 210 TURD BURGLAR; 7 TV; 50 UNSTABLE LOAD; 366 VELCRO DICK; 809 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 327 WANK-KING’S WANKER; 27 WHORE IN THE WINDOW
Returners – 15
5 Khwandee Dinessen; ; 2 Ben Pratt; 55 BEETROOT HEAD; 65 BIGGUS DICKUS; 513 DUCHESS TADPOLE; 60 HAWKEYE; 315 KARAMBA; 23 KIWI BUBBLE HEAD; 140 LINEAR ACCELERATOR; 20 RUNNING DEER; 436 SQUEEZE MY TUBE; 8 STUPID SOUR KRAUT; 28 TOSSA; 289 TREE FROG; 12 TWISTY
Visitors (PH3 Total Runs) – 11
2 Mike Whitley – Bali Hash, Indonesia
6 NOT YET – Bangkok Hash, Thailand
1 TOE JAM – Chiang Mai Hash, Thailand
1 FUNNY BONES – Friends of the Mole Hash, UK
8 TIN-TIN – Hong Kong Hash, HK, China
1 FLYING FUX – Little Sai Wan Hash, HK, China
2 Andre Van der sluys – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
23 ZENERGY – Pattaya Jungle Irregular Lunar Hash, Thailand
3 GENDER BENDER – Unknown Hash
3 KISSEY-KISSEY – Unknown Hash
1 POOR BLOVER – Unknown Hash
Virgins – 2
Leavers – 0
~ none this week ~
Anniversaries – 2
TOM BOY was congratulated for 5 Hared Runs.
UNSTABLE LOAD was congratulated om completing his 50th Run.
Hash Name Events – 1
Jan Moeller was given the New Hash Name NOT SO STUPID KRAUT KUNT.
Saints and Sinners – 1
Hash Trash – LINEAR ACCELERATOR – Littering the circle with his wallet full of money.
~ none this week ~