Scribe Report by Love Boat
This is my first scribe so I want to thank TAMPAX for helping me with some names which I didn’t know.
The circle started as always with the hares on the ice, SIR FROG and NO MORE CUM. Everyone agreed that the run had been nice, interesting and good. SIR FROG celebrated 20 years with PH3. WANK-KING´S WANKER and KEE MAH on the ice. They will hare the next run together with MENTAL DISORDER. The run will be a St. Patrick’s Day Run with free booze and pea and ham soup supplied by the hares.
SIR FREE WILLY took care of the Raffle and all the winners were happy with their cookies, wines, rice cooker and whatnot.
EMPEROR AIRHEAD iced the hares again and compared the site with the scenery in Blair Witch Project which was a really scary movie. This site was a little more nice and cozy with good parking and plenty of peeing space as he pointed out. He also told the story about FREE WILLY who took riding lessons because he wanted to arrive (somewhere) on a white horse and instead arrived to prison in a white van.
SEAL SUCKER and BANANAS were iced and were asked if Australians really think New Zealanders are inferior. SEAL SUCKER said the NZ:s were all assholes, so from that you have to draw your own conclusions.
EMPEROR AIRHEAD also had this kind of education bit about the squids in Australia. They have on each suction cup one tooth as big as a lion-tooth. Isn’t it amazing how much this man knows! Finally, he iced Virgin Freddie from Belgium and visitor Reginald, also from Belgium.
MENTAL DISORDER rewarded: BANANAS 50 runs, ROBBING BASTARD 200 runs, PAPRIKA SMILEY 100 runs. Suggestions were made that the t-shirt given to ROBBING BASTARD should have a built-in GPS. Why?
SIR FROG took the circle and got very sentimental, almost crying, when icing his old friends EMPEROR AIRHEAD, VELCRO DICK, STUPID KRAUT K**T, BILLION SUCKER. Also icing heroes LONE WOLF, TAMPAX, WIKI and LORD CHICKEN FUCKER. He put SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD in the bucket reminding him of when he was saved from drowning by LONE WOLF when they were on a boat ride. TAMPAX is the engineer of the table holding some lights that nobody wanted to touch fearing an electric shock. SIR FROG finally iced all the visitors, they were five so one had to sit in the bucket.
The icing went on and on by SHEIK MEME and finally LORD CHICKEN FUCKER took the circle and iced SCAR W/2T’S and started asking questions about the girl/boyfriend of SCAR W/2T’S, BELL STAR. No answers were given and CHICKEN FUCKER then iced NO MORE CUM and we were told that NO MORE CUM’s daughter will arrive in a couple of weeks.
Then it was SIR FROG‘s turn to be iced and we were supposed to guess what the two men had in common. No one came up with the correct answer, that they had been living in the same house but not at the same time. He also iced BALL RINGER and taught him how to raise children. Don´t buy them a bed but instead let them stand in a flower pot during night time and they will grow and become tall, just like a plant.
TURD BURGLAR was iced and a story about him following a katoy to Naklua for a nose job was told. CHICKEN FUCKER said that all katoys should have noses like Pinocchio since they are all liars. Can that really be true? The virgins were iced and a far too complicated story about ice and Viagra was told.
Then CHICKEN FUCKER wanted a woman on the ice and LADY SNAKE was iced. STUPID KRAUT K**T then paid 100 baht just for the pleasure of sitting on the same ice as LADY SNAKE.
Then suddenly he asked if it was raining and since it wasn’t all with hats on were put on the ice. NO MORE CUM did not have a hat but it seems that the tiny ponytail he has can also count as a hat so he was also iced.
Finally, CHICKEN FUCKER celebrated TADPOLE who has done 466 runs!
SCAR W/2T’S took the circle and iced Hulk and gave him the advice to only chase after women he can catch, since he had sprained his ankle chasing after younger and faster women. Of course he did not admit that and had a completely different story about how he sprained the ankle. BAHT BUS GESTAPO was iced because one of his drivers was lousy, 1/4 POUNDER WITH CHEESE was iced because he was not afraid of anything, not even going to Nigeria, BUT he has unmentionable t-shirts in a hidden closet as a dark secret.
Then suddenly STEPTOE was iced because he had combed his hair and changed to dry clothes and invited the hashers to cheese and biscuits? The visitors were iced and one of them lied to SCAR W/2T’S and ended up in the bucket. His shoes looked new but SCAR said that with the performance of the visitor they would look equally new after 50 runs.
MENTAL DISORDER then took the circle and explained that he was a walker because he wanted to look at women’s bums instead of looking at the rather ugly bums of the front runners. Then he really tried to find out with the help of ROBBING BASTARD‘s wife, the performance time of ROBBING BASTARD. The only thing that was settled was that ROBBING BASTARD goes to his friends for coffee with a happy ending. And that takes 4 hours.
SEAL SUCKER and all the Black Sheep were iced. NO MORE CUM as being a Black Sheep wannabe threw himself headlong in the bucket. He iced CHICKEN FUCKER and SCAR W/2T’S because CF could not see the difference between MENTAL DISORDER and SCAR W/2T’S.
STEPTOE took the circle and iced a visitor, VV and SCAR W/2T’S and claimed that he had been made fun of by these guys and a telephone ringing which wasn’t his? TURD BURGLAR was iced and he was informed that he cannot do blowjobs anymore since he had his teeth replaced. But instead he now has a massive smile.
On-On! Love Boat
Next week’s scribe is Absolutely No Fucking Idea
Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.
Total Runners This Week – 76
Hashers Present Last Week – 50
2 Laslo Banfai; 2 Poul Jensen; 3 Sunita Kaethakhan; 220 1/4 POUNDER WITH CHEESE; 180 ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING IDEA; 40 BAHT BUS GESTAPO; 547 BALL RINGER; 50 BANANAS; 8 BOW TIE; 62 BURL IVES; 16 COMES WITH PRESSURE; 118 CROCODILE; 45 DEL BOY; 1344 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 143 FLYING FINN; 10 FRODO; 131 FUZZY LURE; 238 GANGREEN; 48 GOLDEN RIVET; 222 KEE MAH; 643 LADY FLIPPER; 289 LIBERACE; 388 LONE WOLF; 80 LOST CAUSE; 39 LOVE BOAT; 163 MARATHON MAN; 116 MENSTRUAL DISORDER; 136 MENTAL DISORDER; 12 MENTAL TAMPAX; 59 MISS USE ME; 694 MRS. HEAD; 135 NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER; 186 NO MORE CUM; 104 PAPRIKA SMILEY; 147 RATSO-EEL-SNIFFER; 202 ROBBING BASTARD; 231 SCAR W/2TS; 202 SHEIK MEME; 635 SIR ARSE-A-HOLIC; 665 SIR FREE WILLY; 665 SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD; 830 SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD; 365 STINKY SLOPPY SECONDS; 209 STUPID KRAUT KUNT; 467 TADPOLE; 399 TAMPAX; 155 TWO TIME; 342 VELCRO DICK; 764 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 271 WANK-KING’S WANKER
Returners – 19
5 Sara Sray; 194 BILLION SUCKER; 324 FUCK THE TRUTH; 4 HAG SHAGGER; 110 HELIUM HEAD; 110 HULK; 70 INVISIBLE MAN; 29 LADY SNAKE; 1072 LORD CHICKEN FUCKER; 30 MICKY MAOW; 371 ODD-JOB; 43 PRINCESS BUM BOY; 90 RABBIT SHOOTER; 195 SEAL SUCKER; 656 SIR FROG; 115 SPECIAL PRICE; 176 STEPTOE; 71 SUZY WONG; 195 TURD BURGLAR
Visitors (PH3 Total Runs) – 5
3 MARCUS SKIDDUS – Dublin Hash, Ireland
1 GREEN MACHINE – Melbourne Hash, Australia
1 Clive Booth – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
1 Mats Hoegblom – Pattaya Jungle Irregular Lunar Hash, Thailand
1 Marc Van geyrt – Subic Bay Hash, Philippines
Virgins – 2
Reggy Van Hoge
Leavers – 0
~ none this week ~
Anniversaries – x
ROBBING BASTARD was awarded his 200th Run T-Shirt.
PAPRIKA SMILEY was awarded his 100th Run T-Shirt.
BANANAS was congratulated on completing his 50th Run.
Hash Name Events – 0
~ none this week ~
Saints and Sinners – 0
~ none this week ~
~ none this week ~