Scribe Report by Golden Rivet
Well, this week’s run saw 50 Hashers partake in a 4 km walk or 6+ km run with much of the walk/run being over fairly simple terrain. A good run nevertheless. With the run out of the way, the Scottish Hares, GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER and REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD began dishing out the “Scotch on the Rocks” …usually without the rocks. This went down pretty smooth and along with a few beers made my scribbled notes illegible toward the end of the night.
It was noticed a case of Pepsi that was on the Raffle table suddenly disappeared once all the tickets were sold. After numerous complaints, miraculously SIR FREE WILLY pulled the case of Pepsi out of his ass and the Raffle was on including the Pepsi. SIR FREE WILLY also did his best to break the bathroom scale won by a fellow hasher in the Raffle.
The GM took over with the Raffle behind us icing SIR FREE WILLY and G.I. JOE, though I’m not sure why. Whatever the reason, they probably deserved it. Certainly SIR FREE WILLY deserved a couple hours in the bucket for both the Pepsi and bathroom scale involvements. The Hares and ABSOLUTELY NO F*CKING IDEA were iced next. Mel Gibson would have been proud of the Hares as their makeup was as good if not better than the “Braveheart” war paint.
EMPEROR AIRHEAD failed in his attempt to make the nipper MINOR DISORDER a bartender, and took the circle also icing the Hares. EMPEROR AIRHEAD gave credit to the Scots for being the first on the moon amongst other things, to the dismay of the Americans on the outskirts. Who knows, there may be a “moon” bar in Aberdeen somewhere? The EMPEROR is a stickler about the directional signs to find the sights and once again scolded the Hares for using dark blue and black letters… fair enough. BANANA BENDER and BURL IVES then offered some sort of ancient Scottish folk song to the Hares. This was followed by the EMPEROR giving an explanation of the history of the Scottish Kilt. Something about Haggis, fake sheep’s stomach got involved in this history but damned if I can remember why.
A new guy “Hans” next took the ice to be named. Apparently this guy has yet to say 2 words to anyone at these events, but although there were several names suggested relating to this sickness, the group chose SLACK VAGINA as his Hash Name. Go figure. BAHT BUS GESTAPO was next to take the ice and his Tee Luk who also needed a Hash Name. There was no voting allowed here with EMPEROR AIRHEAD dubbing her LADY SNAKE.
The GM now took over the circle icing LIBERACE and SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD noting both of them could use some help with their choice of clothing. LIBERACE received a well deserved T-shirt for completing 10 Hared Runs. GANGREEN was recognized for 200 Runs. ABSOLUTELY NO F*CKING IDEA was next welcomed to the ice bucket.
GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER took over the circle briefly with some discussion included about whether a female dog is a bitch or a dog?? Beats me.
The GM once again took over the circle icing both MENTAL DISORDER and better half MENSTRUAL DISORDER. MENSTRUAL DISORDER‘s urchin MINOR DISORDER was thrown in for good measure.
Some more folk songs were next, with the Beatles song “She Loves You” being completely butchered and extended to what seemed like a half hour!
B.B. iced the GM and ABSOLUTELY NO F*CKING IDEA. I then lost track of things with 8 Hashers being iced at once. BURL IVES next took the circle icing the Hares combined with more rhythm & blues & some church music. Sweet Chariot & it was time to go.
ON-ON ! Golden Rivet
Next week’s scribe is Linear Accelerator.
Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.
Total Runners This Week – 50
Hashers Present Last Week – 35
164 ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING IDEA; 99 B. B.; 10 BAHT BUS GESTAPO; 508 BALL RINGER; 134 BENGT POTATO; 8 CLASSIC; 1308 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 542 G.I. JOE; 200 GANGREEN; 690 GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER; 21 GOLDEN RIVET; 173 KILL BENNY; 604 LADY FLIPPER; 78 LADY GAGA; 6 LADY SNAKE; 248 LIBERACE; 87 LINEAR ACCELERATOR; 363 LONE WOLF; 43LOST CAUSE; 154 MARATHON MAN; 656 MRS. HEAD; 286 PELER; 34 PISSED AS A RAT; 66 PUSSY FUCKER; 19 ROTATE HER LATER; 20 SAUCE FOR THE GOOSE; 624 SIR FREE WILLY; 624 SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD; 792 SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD; 18 ; LIPPERY SAM; 359 SQUEEZE MY TUBE; 329 STINKY SLOPPY SECONDS; 16 STOOL MOVER; 729 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 230 WANK-KING’S WANKER
Returners – 12
3 Wichuda Wongkamsan; 28 BIGGUS DICKUS; 29 BURL IVES; 74 CAMEL HUMPER; 70 DESERT SCORPION; 255 DOESN’T TOUCH THE SIDES; 139 HONEY BEAR; 91 MENSTRUAL DISORDER; 108 MENTAL DISORDER; 28 MISUSE ME; 91 SCARLET PIMPERNEL; 18 SLACK VAGINA
Visitors (PH3 Total Runs) – 3
3 Azrin Buyong – Brunei Hash
23 HAWKEYE – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
5 MINOR DISORDER – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
Virgins – 0
~ none this week ~
Leavers – 3
Anniversaries – 3
LIBERACE was awarded his 10th Hared Run T-Shirt
SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD was congratulated for his 10th Hared Run
GANGREEN was congratulated on completing his 200th Run
Hash Name Events – 2
Karina Vahitova was given the New Hash Name LADY SNAKE
Hans Boye was given the New Hash Name SLACK VAGINA
Saints and Sinners – 0
~ none this week ~
~ none this week ~