Start of the run the virgin and her partner are called into the circle and the guy is given 2 Chang down downs for new shoes. Welcome to Mondays Hash guys. It all started for him there, and he was to become part of the entertainment for us later on.
I know 5 hashers had their own run and their comments where, the trail was flat and the Chang and Leo where good. I don’t know how they manage to find bars in some of the run areas, but they do. Speaking to other hashers that ran the real trail their comments where that some of the cattle on the run appeared a bit frisky, and the run was a bit short for some people and I believe a couple even ran around again. A bit of social drinking catching up with friends, and some food from VV’s alfresco restaurant is always good before the start of the circle.
Our GM Wankers Wanking calls the circle and ices the hares, questions are asked about the run and comments where, Temples, Muslims, and Vaseline Thighs. Not sure what the connections where to any of them though, but it was agreed that although the run was a little short it was still good, and that the A site was great. Well done hares. Then he gets out the liars for not owning up to new shoes so F T Truth and Sir MC are both iced and given double down downs, well done WW. Pays to own up if you wear new shoes on a run folks.
Then our GM talks about a Veterans Run, and there’s me thinking that every week is one of those. Its then over to our brew master to draw the raffle, which I noticed was mainly alcohol this week. Great prizes for the winners and us losers just look on licking our lips. Squeeze my Tube tried to win GI Joe a prize by going out with the wrong ticket. Not sure if she wanted to win booze for Joe, or just get him iced.
Our RA Airhead then takes over the circle and you always know that we are in for something special from him and we weren’t disappointed. Starts off by bringing the virgin in and her
partner that have just started a World tour. Our male visitor is sat in the bucket as he says that he hashed before in Bali but forgot what he was named. Should have remembered there mate, because by forgetting it that gave Airhead a chance to rename you. Whilst he is in the bucket his mrs Jolanda (thought if she was ever named she could be known as Milk and Honey) is putting ice on his old fella, and that starts the talk of 3 second sex, jumping off cliffs, slavery markets in Africa and so on. Anyway our visitor is finally renamed Dingo, so that made us think that if they ever return Yolanda will have to be named Lindy Chamberlain. If you don’t know the story then ask an Aussie, and if he can remember back that far he will tell you the story.
Necrophilia Knight Rider is iced, dead babies
and being thrown off a cliff are mentioned and I believe that has something to do with the first part of his hash name. Bananas form the land of the long white cloud is iced and sheep jokes are told. People wanted to know why Kiwi’s always wear gum boots and Velcro clothes when going for a walk in the bush.
Then the Hulk and WW are iced and a story is told about Free Willy loosing 69 kilo so he once looked like the Hulk but now looks like WW. As you know if you lose a lot of weight you end up with flabby skin so the question is asked, where did Free Willys go? Has he sold it off?
Chicken Fucker is given a down down for his 1050 run. Lineal Accelerator is freed from being accused of hash trash last week. Barnacle Bolloks sings a song about a mermaid and is to be next week’s scribe. Hope he remembers. Chicken Fucker has fun in the circle with the visitors, and also sings the hare song, an old Bob Dylan number with words by CF.
Leavers are given down downs, returners or retards are also given down downs and then lead us with the hash hymn. And the end of another great Monday spent with the Pattaya Hash draws to the close.
It’s on the bus with another beer, some head off to Jamisons and I head off to meet up with my Mrs for what was to be a quite beer. We finally got home some time Tuesday morning and that’s my reason for writing the words late Tuesday night. But what a day.
ON ON Forever BB
Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.
Total Runners this week = 64
46 Hashers who were Hashing the previous week
17 Sirinan T.n. dee; 71 B. B.; 416 BALL RINGER; 18 BANANAS; 262 BELL END; 148 BEVERLY HILLS PINK COCK; 221 BIN TIN TIN; 477 BOW WOW; 43 CABBAGE PATCH; 195 CRACK MY COCCYX; 87 CRAZY PUSSY; 179 DOESN’T TOUCH THE SIDES; 1223 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 222 EMPTY SPERMBANK; 453 G.I. JOE; 108 GANGREEN; 612 GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER; 77 HONEY BEAR; 120 HORSE; 148 LIBERACE; 8 LINEAR ACCELERATOR; 35 MENSTRUAL DISORDER; 38 MENTAL DISORDER; 514 MIDNIGHT STAR; 558 MRS. HEAD; 15 NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER; 220 PELER; 115 PINKABOO; 194 REAR GUNNER; 62 SCARLET; 636 SIR ARSE HOPPER; 529 SIR ARSE-A-HOLIC; 515 SIR BOTTOMLESS PIT; 629 SIR DOG; 536 SIR MC; 532 SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD; 701 SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD; 18 SPERM POLLUTER; 278 SQUEEZE MY TUBE; 235 SWEETIE; 407 TADPOLE; 40 TESTICLES; 485 UNCLE PERVY; 31 VASELINE THIGHS; 634 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 131 WANK-KING’S WANKER
116 BABY WIPES; 146 BARNACLE BOLLOX; 156 BILLION SUCKER; 26 DISGUSTING; 197 DOG LICKS ITS DICK; 309 FUCK THE TRUTH; 51 HULK; 29 LITTLE WHITE DOVE; 287 LONE WOLF; 1050 LORD CHICKEN FUCKER; 36 POCAHONTAS; 40 RUNNING BARE; 388 SNOOPY; 241 STINKY SLOPPY SECONDS; 145 TURD BURGLAR
2 Visitors with their Total Runs and Mother Hash
1 DINGO — Bali Hash, Indonesia
17 BIMBO — Bangkok Hash, Thailand
LORD CHICKEN FUCKER 1050th Run
1 Crash Crash Event
NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER
1 New Hash Names:
Matt Hall named DINGO – New Hash Name
FUCK THE TRUTH — Hash Trash (for dirty habits)
LINEAR ACCELERATOR — Hash Trash removed