Category Archives: Run Updates – 2017

Run 1725

 


—– RUN REPORT —–

Scribe Report by My Girlfriend Knows I’m Gay

~ coming soon ~

On-On!  My Girlfriend Knows I’m Gay

Next week’s scribe is to be announced

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—– STATS REPORT —–

Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.

Total Runners This Week – xx

Hashers Present Last Week – xx

~ coming soon ~

Returners – xx

xx

Visitors (PH3 Total Runs) – x

x

Virgins – x

x

Leavers – x

x

Anniversaries – x

xx

Hash Name Events – 0

~ none this week ~

Saints and Sinners – 0

~ none this week ~

Birthdays – 0

~ none this week ~


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Run 1724

 


—– RUN REPORT —–

Scribe Report by Who Cut the Cheese

Today was the VV Sausage BBQ Run and the hares were VV and TWO TIME. This location had everything from lakes, fields, trees and cows to building sites and the distant aroma of the nearby rubbish tip to clear the nostrils. Wonderful stuff.

I personally can vouch that the run was clearly papered as this time we managed to get back before the circle had started for a change.

On completion of the run 86 hashers were welcomed back with assorted beverages, snacks and of course the option of the VV BBQ Sausage. Good stuff.

The Grand Master started the proceedings with the icing of the hares. All agreed both VV and TWO TIME had done a sterling job this run. Well Done.

Next up was SIR FREE WILLY and his Raffle. Can’t give you the names of the winners as my girlfriend kept pushing her tickets in my face at this time.

AIRHEAD up next and duly got the hares iced again. It was pointed out that it was TWO TIME who does all the work in this relationship and she even drives the beer truck. Having been furnished with this news some of the male Hashers had to enquire if she had a sister available?

Next to be iced was BILLION SUCKER and NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER. An interesting discussion on electronic sex was conducted including the pros and cons of such a hobby and the cost that it entails.

SIR WANDA and STUPID KRAUT KUNT iced next. It was pointed out that SIR WANDA had actually moved to Phuket many years ago when it was a one boat fishing village and single-handedly turned it into the successful resort it is today. An unbelievable achievement we all agreed.

Three virgins next up. (Well two actually as one had already pissed off). The remaining two didn’t really have much going for them either. First they were German and second they work with SKK. Poor Bastards.

Birthday time and VV was duly called out again to be iced and receive his cake. It was considerate for the girls to actually make it this time instead of just mixing the ingredients on his head. Unfortunately due to the amount of candles we all had to move back as the heat from them was giving us a sun tan.

WANK-KING’S WANKER circle and award ceremonies for their achievements. (See STATS below for the details).

LOVE BOAT, SUGAR DADDY and SIR WANDA all got an invite to take a seat and explain to the Hashes the consequences of being caught by the police while being slightly intoxicated. As it turns out 10,000 baht in cash.

The Grand Master brings in NO MORE CUM in to explain what happened to his pony tail? By all accounts the reason it was removed was due to the fact there have been too many female imposters trying to emulate and aspire to his fashion statement.

SCAR W/2TS takes the circle and rightly brings in the Germans. SKK and his two fellow work colleagues. This was followed by FINGERLESS proving to us all that he will drink anything that is put in front of him.

Grand Master calls DIRT LOONEY, THE WIZARD, WANK-KING’S WANKER, SKK, and GANGREEN for talking. Constructive abuse was duly handed out.

Nearing the end now and the Call on the Hares by REDCOAT. A fine song it was too.

It was only a matter of time but yet again we had to get the Germans back in to sing us a German song. Can’t say it was memorable but who really cares anyway?

Finally a big thanks to the hares for a fine day of hashing. A reminder to all to make sure you save all your tin opener tabs we are collecting for a very good cause.

The Hash’s Tahitian Queen was well attended as usual and a big thanks to EMPEROR AIRHEAD for the hot food awaiting our arrival. Much appreciated.

On-On!  Who Cut the Cheese

Next week’s scribe is My Girlfriend Knows I’m Gay

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—– STATS REPORT —–

Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.

Total Runners This Week – 86

Hashers Present Last Week – 57

3 Mark Penders; 12 ARSE BANDIT; 28 ARSE VAN HOLE; 72 BAHT BUS GESTAPO; 598 BALL RINGER; 381 BELL END; 119 BEN 10; 208 BILLION SUCKER; 109 CAMEL HUMPER; 101 DESERT SCORPION; 84 DIRT LOONEY; 315 DOESN’T TOUCH THE SIDES; 511 DUCHESS TADPOLE; 1391 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 51 FINGERLESS; 169 FLYING FINN[ 149 FUZZY LURE; 627 G.I. JOE; 290 GANGREEN; 295 GERMAN SHEPHERD; 32 HARBOR WHORE; 126 HELIUM HEAD; 51 IM LAO; 193 JACKAL; 692 LADY FLIPPER; 335 LIBERACE; 65 LOVE BOAT; 20 MAYO QUEEN; 740 MRS. HEAD; 71 MY GIRLFRIEND KNOWS I’M GAY; 181 NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER; 208 NO MORE CUM; 398 ODD-JOB; 352 PELER; 25 PINK DOLPHIN; 81 PRINCESS BUM BOY; 39 RAT VON KIEL; 10 REAL OLD; 176 REDCOAT; 253 SCAR W/2TS; 687 SIR ARSE-A-HOLIC; 714 SIR FREE WILLY; 876 SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD; 25 SMOKEY TRUCKY FUCKY; 131 SPECIAL PRICE; 435 SQUEEZE MY TUBE; 222 STUPID KRAUT KUNT; 432 TAMPAX; 49 TELLY TUBBY; 36 THE WIZARD; 194 TWO TIME; 20 ULI’S GOOLIES; 47 UNSTABLE LOAD; 363 VELCRO DICK; 806 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 324 WANK-KING’S WANKER; 24 WHORE IN THE WINDOW

Returners – 16

6 Wassana Songsop; 70 BANANAS; 201 BEVERLY HILLS PINK COCK; 26 BLACK DIAMOND; 6 BLACK WIDOW; 54 BORDERLINE; 54 CASPER; 45 CIA; 762 GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER; 59 LADY SNAKE; 123 PAPRIKA SMILEY; 45 SIR WANDA; 79 SPERM POLLUTER; 72 STREET CLEANER; 43 SUGAR DADDY; 207 TURD BURGLAR

Visitors (PH3 Total Runs) – 10

  5 INIBRIO – Bangkok Hash, Thailand
  1 TRIPLE J – Brisbane Hash, Australia
  8 CHRISTOPHERCUMSEMEN – Chiang Mai Hash, Thailand
14 HANDYMAN Ludvika Hash, Sweden
  1 INCOGNITO Ludvika Hash, Sweden
  1 MEATBALL – Ludvika Hash, Sweden
  1 Waraporn Noonil – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
17 BLACK DRAGON – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
  4 WHO CUT THE CHEESE – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
  1 Ann Bunwan – Unknown Hash
PINK DOLPHIN is now a full member having completed 25 runs with PH3.

Virgins – 3

Keith Dufren
Long Hoang
Andy Rudo

Leavers – 0

~ none this week ~

Anniversaries – 4

TWO TIME was congratulated for her 20th Hared Run.
BEVERLY HILLS PINK COCK was awarded his 200th Run T-Shirt.
FINGERLESS was awarded his 50th Run Hat.
IM LAO was awarded her 50th Run T-Shirt.

Hash Name Events – 0

~ none this week ~

Saints and Sinners – 0

~ none this week ~

Birthdays – 2

Happy Birthday ARSE VAN HOLE 19 March
Happy Birthday VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR 19 March


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Run 1723

 


—– RUN REPORT —–

Scribe Report by No More Cum

Today was our annual St. Patrick’s Day R*n and the hares were KEE MAH, WANK-KING’S WANKER, MENTAL and MENSTRUAL from the DISORDER family. The wonderful location was at the side of the lake near Buddha Mountain.

The r*n was clearly papered and and took in some enjoyable scenery.

On completion of the r*n, 102 hashers were welcomed back with the usual snacks augmented by portions of pea and ham stew served up with rice and bread. The majority, with well-honed lifelong tendencies towards strong liquor, were equally elated by the inclusion of shots of Jamesons to help settle their digestion. That wasn’t all they had to smile about. A free commemorative shirt was also theirs to take away. This would have been an added bonus to those whose wardrobes can only boast shirts of an orange hue.

The theme was St Patrick and the colours were those of the Irish tricolor, predominantly green and the hares wore the now familiar hats to celebrate the day. The pre-raffle of a bottle of Jameson’s was won by the ever popular Raffle Master SIR FREE WILLY with ticket 89.

Once SCAR W/2T’S had dealt with the hares, we were entertained by SIR FREE WILLY, who thought the circle had developed an interest in Rugby and proceeded to bore us all about how both English male and female teams had obliterated Scotland at the said sport. BURL IVES sat down to endure the best SFW could offer in the form of mockery before we finally moved on to his real raison d’etre, the Raffle.

Prizes were scooped up by the following lucky winners: ULI’S GOOLIES, ODD-JOB, POLE FUCKER, HARBOUR WHORE, BLUE NOSE, GIGGLE TITS, MAYO QUEEN, TESTICLES and GROUCHO MARX. LORD CHICKEN FUCKER was talking to me, so I might have missed one.

It was now the GM’s turn to ice the hashers with birthdays this week. GADDAFI’S BRIDE sat down together with CRAPPER, while their girls proceeded to make pretend cakes on their heads, consisting of flour, eggs and chocolate sauce – lovely.

EMPEROR AIRHEAD sat the hares down in the traditional manner and, amongst other things, made reference to KEE MAH buying a 10 wheel dump truck for his ex-missus. What happened to the water buffalos of by-gone decades? It also transpired that the food, thought to have been prepared by female hands, was in fact courtesy of BAM BAM, a face we haven’t seen on the PH3 for quite a while.

Then NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER sat down with his prize bear, we learnt about his tendency  to fritter away vast sums on whores and his recent attempts to cultivate meaningful relationships. His desire to follow this route seemed to have been blunted somewhat by a hefty 75,000 Baht bill to have his car fixed after one girl crashed it.  A final resort to electronic dating left him with a 5,000 Baht bill for dinner and with the inclination to return to his former ways.

The EMPEROR then sat down BILLION SUCKER and LINEAR ACCELERATOR, looking like Stevie Wonder in dark glasses. It is night time, by the way. BILLION SUCKER, in his exuberance to prove how alcohol turns him into John Travolta, has reportedly twirled one of the TQ dancers into the pole at the end of the stage, nearly knocking her out. On the same theme, the reason for LA’s dark glasses now comes to light. Having developed a Bangkok habit of late, he has somehow managed to upset customers in an Irish bar there and received 2 black eyes for his troubles. I think that the perpetrators must have had small fists, in order to inflict such injuries, without hitting his nose.

A virgin called Hubert has now passed out from the Belgian Hash Training Camp and swelled the numbers on the PH3 from this strange place still further.

It was now WANK-KING’S WANKER’s turn to exercise his steely grip on the circle and thrust commemorative shirts into the hands of grateful recipients. BULL TRACK received a 50 Run version, while RUBBER DICK is close behind myself with a 200 Run Shirt. A 50 Run anniversary was shared between IM LAO and FINGERLESS.

The hares relied on TAMPAX to provide his version of “The Wild Rover”, which was familiar to most of the circle and warmly received. TAMPAX unknowingly had the 3 Degrees in the form of TELLY TUBBY, LOST CAUSE and TOM BOY to back him.

The circle was once again honoured by the presence of LORD CHICKEN FUCKER, who sat down MENTAL DISORDER, SCAR W/2T’S and WANK-KING’S WANKER and accused them of being brainless due to their reliance on clipboards. After delivering his version of the Bob Dylan classic “It Ain’t Me Babe”, he then proceeded to wander about with a clipboard of his own, bemoaning the recent demise of his side Millwall at the hands of the football elite that is Tottenham Hotspur.

SCAR W/2T’S finally got to grips with sloppy elements in the circle and iced both sitters and trouble-makers in general. LORD CHICKEN FUCKER was introduced to his grey-haired female fan club. It was difficult to tell whether these were the same hashers, who had thrown their large under-garments into the circle earlier, in a wild frenzy of unbridled delight at LCF’s appearance on our coveted stage.

Once REDCOAT had made his vocal offering about Belinda, her window and his sombrero, I drifted off into a world between life and death and can only remember a shocking image of BURL IVES and yet another song. After pulling myself together, I was able to “Swing Low” with everyone else.

I conclude finally with a big thank you to the hares for a fine day of hashing. A special thank you goes to KEE MAH, our resident philanthropist, who asked for no more than 5,000 Baht from the PH3 towards the costs of this event. Take your time and work his generosity out for yourself. Nicky’s Bar was well attended as usual and made us very welcome. I thanked Debbie personally and hope others take the time to show their appreciation to our hash bars.

On-On!  No More Cum

Next week’s scribe is to be announced

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—– STATS REPORT —–

Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.

Total Runners This Week – 102

Hashers Present Last Week – 71

4 Anna Maria Wilhemsen; 142 ANTIQUE; 11 ARSE BANDIT; 27 ARSE VAN HOLE; 71 BAHT BUS GESTAPO; 597 BALL RINGER; ; 3 BEETROOT HEAD; 380 BELL END; 118 BEN 10; 207 BILLION SUCKER; 4 BOLLY WOOD; 104 BURL IVES; 108 CAMEL HUMPER; 24 CHICKEN DUNDEE; 102 CRAPPER; 100 DESERT SCORPION; 83 DIRT LOONEY; 510 DUCHESS TADPOLE; 168 FLYING FINN; 148 FUZZY LURE; 626 G.I. JOE; 12 GADDAFI’S BRIDE; 6 GADDAFI’S HUSBAND; 289 GANGREEN; 8 GIGGLE TITS; 93 GOLDEN RIVET; 20 GOOSEY GOOSEY GOBBLER; 10 GROUCHO MARX; 31 HARBOR WHORE; 125 HELIUM HEAD; 5 JACK WOW; 691 LADY FLIPPER; 334 LIBERACE; 125 LOST CAUSE; 64 LOVE BOAT; 11 LOVELY LADY; 19 MAYO QUEEN; 153 MENSTRUAL DISORDER; 179 MENTAL DISORDER; 102 MISS USE ME; 10 MR GIGGLE SHIT; 739 MRS. HEAD; 180 NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER; 87 NEXT WEEK; 207 NO MORE CUM; 397 ODD-JOB; 351 PELER; 44 PHANTOM; 24 PINK DOLPHIN; 65 POCKET SOCKET; 80 PRINCESS BUM BOY; 38 RAT VON KIEL; 9 REAL OLD; 252 SCAR W/2TS; 686 SIR ARSE-A-HOLIC; 713 SIR FREE WILLY; 875 SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD; 24 SMOKEY TRUCKY FUCKY; 130 SPECIAL PRICE; 13 SPLINTER DICK; 434 SQUEEZE MY TUBE; 48 TELLY TUBBY; 35 THE WIZARD; 219 TOM BOY; 193 TWO TIME; 19 ULI’S GOOLIES; 46 UNSTABLE LOAD; 362 VELCRO DICK; 805 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 323 WANK-KING’S WANKER; 23 WHORE IN THE WINDOW

Returners – 28

3 Laslo Banfai; 2 Andy Douglas; 2 Jan Moeler; 2 Mark Penders; 66 BLUE NOSE; 5 BORING PRICK; 53 BULLTRACK; 260 CRACK MY COCCYX; 314 DOESN’T TOUCH THE SIDES; 1390 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 50 FINGERLESS; 294 GERMAN SHEPHERD; 50 IM LAO; 192 JACKAL; 233 KEE MAH; 139 LINEAR ACCELERATOR; 1077 LORD CHICKEN FUCKER; 95 MINELESS CUNT; 70 MY GIRLFRIEND KNOWS I’M GAY; 40 POLE FUCKER; 372 RAMBO WW2; 312 RAMBOWLING; 164 RATSO-EEL-SNIFFER; 175 REDCOAT; 201 RUBBER DICK; 221 STUPID KRAUT KUNT; 431 TAMPAX; 72 TESTICLES

Visitors (PH3 Total Runs) – 2

4 LUCAN MADE ME CUM – Bangkok Hash, Thailand
3 ETOOFALI – Kampala H3, Uganda

Virgins – 1

Hubert Tison

Leavers – 0

~ none this week ~

Anniversaries – 5

RUBBER DICK was awarded his 200th Run T-Shirt.
BULLTRACK was awarded his 50th Run T-Shirt.
DESERT SCORPION was congratulated on completing her 100th Run.
FINGERLESS was congratulated on completing his 50th Run.
IM LAO was congratulated on completing her 50th Run.

Hash Name Events – 0

~ none this week ~

Saints and Sinners – 0

~ none this week ~

Birthdays – 0

~ none this week ~


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