Category Archives: Run Updates – 2017

Run 1733

 


—– RUN REPORT —–

Scribe Report by Knob Marley

Off we sped from the Buffalo Bar on the adventure of another Monday run. The journey was fine until nearly at the A-Site. The hares had obviosly discovered it when on tank manouvers, but eventually after a risky channel crossing we arrived at the A site. Good open site and very secluded no locals gathering and not even the usual wandering soi dog , so at least we would be private.

Hares explain the run which takes a while as MENTAL DISORDER has this need to repeat everything his co- hares tell us. So eventually after extreme details about some red stars on trail that we should look out for we set off.

The run was good, more of a runners run as fairly flat, quite long for a Monday as around 8.5 km but we were prewarned so should be no complaints. Many took this on board and decided to bail out at the walk stage.

The rest of us a pack of around 15 pretty much stayed together as a few long and sometimes difficult to trace checkbacks were encountered. All in all a good run that took some thought by the hare(s).

Well, after the normal social chit chat the circle is formed and GM hands the circle to GI JOE who says run was good (and he has done a few). All those he asks are in agreement.

THE WIZARD then takes us through the presentation of the collected red stars. Five of the ten stars were found so he offers the winners a kind of deal or no deal on the prize clue they pick. This works out well for DIRT LOONEY who comes away with whiskey and IM LAO is blown away by her signed picture of her dream boy THE WIZARD.

Then it’s on to usual FREE WILLY Raffle with Thai girls winning 5 of the prizes and THE WIZARD claiming Minnie Mouse. Or was it Mickey? The debate goes on but I was certainly in the Minnie camp.

Then the main event EMPEROR AIRHEAD brings in the hares and again all agree good run. He then ices DIRT LOONEY for fame in the Pattaya Mail and generally being a good guy. But must be avoided between the hours of 4-6 AM in the Walking Street area.

Then its the virgin Julius who at 78 must be the oldest virgin on record.

GM then takes over to discuss the photo won by IM LAO. Then it’s the excitement of the awards with WANK-KING’S WANKER (surprised he not been asked to do the Oscars with his natural gifted talent for presenting awards). So its on in MENTAL DISORDER, CRAPPER and UNSTABLE LOAD for 50, 10, and 5 Hared Runs.

Then it’s EMPEROR AIRHEAD for, wait for it ……. 1400 Runs ….. WOW!….., well done TOM. When asked what he wanted he just replied TADPOLE, but the best the Hash could do is say they are working on the restraining order (good shout from the circle).

GM then regains circle and ices harriettes (better known as cracks in my day). This is followed by excellent song by REAR GUNNER.

Then its the turn of BURL IVES who ices the English, something about Rugby. Then its all the fridge dwellers (more commenly known as Belgians) on ice.

Then its hares on in for song. I personally thought this one of the best songs for a long time and got the circle buzzing , clearly the work of the English member of the hares, the up and coming hash member THE WIZARD, (I see a future GM if he keeps up this magic.) Apparently the run was also down to him, but it seems at the moment the other 2 hares MENTAL DISORDER and CRAPPER are in a bit of a lost world without their little Filipino guides.

Well, ‘Swing Low‘ and back to the BLUE HEELER for great food. Thank you and thank all involved for another great day.

On-On!  Knob Marley

Next week’s scribe is to be announced

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—– STATS REPORT —–

Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.

Total Runners This Week – 66

Hashers Present Last Week – 47

2 Chamakorn Jintarak; 145 ANTIQUE; 21 ARSE BANDIT; 37 ARSE VAN HOLE; 607 BALL RINGER; 389 BELL END; 127 BEN 10; 208 BEVERLY HILLS PINK COCK; 112 BURL IVES; 109 CRAPPER; 80 DEL BOY; 93 DIRT LOONEY; 518 DUCHESS TADPOLE; 1400 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 634 G.I. JOE; 298 GANGREEN; 768 GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER; 14 GIGGLE TITS; 101 GOLDEN RIVET; 40 HARBOR WHORE; 126 KNOB MARLEY; 701 LADY FLIPPER; 343 LIBERACE; 433 LONE WOLF; 133 LOST CAUSE; 15 LOVELY LADY; 28 MAYO QUEEN; 186 MENTAL DISORDER; 110 MISS USE ME; 16 MR GIGGLE SHIT; 749 MRS. HEAD; 187 NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER; 359 PELER; 26 PISS ON IT; 90 PRINCESS BUM BOY; 231 SEAL SUCKER; 696 SIR ARSE-A-HOLIC; 723 SIR FREE WILLY; 721 SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD; 885 SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD; 441 SQUEEZE MY TUBE; 57 TELLY TUBBY; 45 THE WIZARD; 201 TWO TIME; 56 UNSTABLE LOAD; 815 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 333 WANK-KING’S WANKER

Returners – 13

148 BENGT POTATO; 67 BIGGUS DICKUS; 320 DOESN’T TOUCH THE SIDES; 43 FUNNY BUNNY; 62 HAWKEYE; 53 IM LAO; 16 LUCKY NUMBER; 26 MR POTATO HEAD; 73 MY GIRLFRIEND KNOWS I’M GAY; 52 PHANTOM; 255 REAR GUNNER; 158 RUNNING BARE; 62 SLACK VAGINA

Visitors (PH3 Total Runs) – 5

  2 THE COUNT – Jakarta Hash, Indonesia
  1 Chris Òsteby – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
18 OUT OF ORDER – Phoenix Hash, Arizona
  1 Tarn Land – Unknown Hash
  1 Steven Wilnour – Unknown Hash

Virgins – 1

Julius Burai

Leavers – 0

~ none this week ~

Anniversaries – 4

MENTAL DISORDER was congratulated for his 50th Hared Run.
CRAPPER was congratulated for his 10th Hared Run.
UNSTABLE LOAD was awarded his 5 Hared Runs Hat.
EMPEROR AIRHEAD was congratulated on completing his 1400th Run.

Hash Name Events – 0

~ none this week ~

Saints and Sinners – 0

~ none this week ~

Birthdays – 0

~ none this week ~


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Run 1732

 


—– RUN REPORT —–

Scribe Report by Try-A-Fuck

Bloody Rain!

Looking out of the window of the coach, at about 5:00 AM Monday, in the Chonburi area. My first Hash in a month and looking forward to talking to some human beings,(thinking the paper will get washed away) F—.

3:00 PM Buffalo Bar

Sunshine, God is Great, as long as the hares have replaced the washed out paper. l had checked out the area of the A-Site a few days earlier on the Hash Web Page. It was about 30 clicks out,plenty of hills in that area and jungle.

No Problem

Plenty of banter on the long journey out to the A-Site. MAYO QUEEN, one of a large party of Belgium Hashers, was was retelling his nightmare story from last Monday. He managed to find his way out of the jungle by 12:30 PM and flagged a motorcycle down, to take him back to Pattaya. He arrived home about 2:30 AM, And we do this for fun.

New A-Site

Great bloody spot, plenty of trees, hills, and privacy no one overlooking us. Good find Hares – BEVERLY HILLS PINK COCK and DEL BOY.

Hare Instructions

Red stick this and Blue stick that, and you may find some paper washed away in the rain, what the F—. They did not go out to check to see if the paper was still there. To cap it all they said watch out for wild boar, they can be dangerous. Are they joking, we are used to the no dogs, no hills, no cattle routine, who believes the hares anyway.

Gentle Pace

Off we went at a gentle pace, l said gentle as sadly lacking today. There were no FRBs, to break the checks. A few mid packers, GI JOE, SEAL SUCKER, JACKAL. l can see in a few years the average age of one of PH3 hashers being about 80 years old.

Our Good Fortune

There was plenty of paper on the ground and clipped to  trees. Clipped paper stays  longer in a thunderstorm. Running along thinking good run so far, nice trails with plenty of trees. My peace was shattered by a blood curdling scream, then a hasher came crashing out of the bushes, screaming, “Boar, boar!”. He shall remain nameless, but he is famous for his ear piercing screams when he has a Hash Crash.

All in All

Good run, well papered, no one got lost. Mind you if ROBBING BASTARD was not back in England he would have had a goood try. He hates coming back in daylight.

Raffle

Same old, Same old, Thai Ladies win most of the prizes as they buy most of the tickets.

AIRHEAD

What can l say? Number one RA, always entertains us.

Illustrious GM

MENTAL DISORDER shared the bucket out fairly to most of the hashers.

THE WIZARD

He took the circle, l can see a future GM in the making, after another couple of years perfecting the art of icing hashers.

BURL IVES

After about one hour into the circle, BURL IVES looked over my shoulder and said, “You’re not taking many notes!” l replied Fairy Stories. Never let the truth get in the way of a good story.

On-On!  Try-A-Fuck

Next week’s scribe is to be announced

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—– STATS REPORT —–

Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.

Total Runners This Week – 69

Hashers Present Last Week – 44

144 ANTIQUE; 20 ARSE BANDIT; 36 ARSE VAN HOLE; 606 BALL RINGER; 388 BELL END; 126 BEN 10; 207 BEVERLY HILLS PINK COCK; 111 BURL IVES; 79 DEL BOY; 92 DIRT LOONEY; 517 DUCHESS TADPOLE; 1399 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 633 G.I. JOE; ; 97 GANGREEN; 767 GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER; 100 GOLDEN RIVET; 39 HARBOR WHORE; 700 LADY FLIPPER; 342 LIBERACE; 432 LONE WOLF; 132 LOST CAUSE; 14 LOVELY LADY; 27 MAYO QUEEN; 109 MISS USE ME; 748 MRS. HEAD; 186 NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER; 5 NINJA PRINCESS; 5 NOISY QUEEN; 33 PINK DOLPHIN; 89 PRINCESS BUM BOY; 46 RAT VON KIEL; 230 SEAL SUCKER; 5 SILENT PRINCESS; 695 SIR ARSE-A-HOLIC; 722 SIR FREE WILLY; 720 SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD; 884 SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD; 440 SQUEEZE MY TUBE; 56 TELLY TUBBY; 44 THE WIZARD; 200 TWO TIME; 55 UNSTABLE LOAD; 814 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 332 WANK-KING’S WANKER

Returners – 20

4 Andy Douglas; 9 Id Malthe; 6 Sara Sray; 108 CRAPPER; 105 DIRTY HARRY; 55 FERRY QUEEN; 6 FORREST HUMP; 327 FUCK THE TRUTH; 13 GIGGLE TITS; 6 HARRY’S PINK CAMEL; 196 JACKAL; 125 KNOB MARLEY; 201 MARATHON MAN; 185 MENTAL DISORDER; 15 MR GIGGLE SHIT; 358 PELER; 25 PISS ON IT; 101 RABBIT SHOOTER; 31 SMOKEY TRUCKY FUCKY; 215 TRY-A-FUCK

Visitors (PH3 Total Runs) – 4

  9 BOLLYWOOD – Bangkok Hash, Thailand
11 JACK WOW – Bangkok Hash, Thailand
  3 Noi Sonsan – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
22 JUNGLE PRINCESS – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand

Virgins – 1

Chamakorn Jintarak

Leavers – 2

FERRY QUEEN
SMOKEY TRUCKY FUCKY

Anniversaries – 4

LADY FLIPPER was congratulated on completing her 700th Run.
TWO TIME was congratulated on completing her 200th Run.
GOLDEN RIVET was congratulated on completing his 100th Run.
RABBIT SHOOTER was awarded his 100th Run T-Shirt.

Hash Name Events – 0

~ none this week ~

Saints and Sinners – 1

Hash Trash – LOVELY LADY – Left her running shoes in the circle, but was glad to get them back.

Birthdays – 0

~ none this week ~


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Run 1731

 


—– RUN REPORT —–

Scribe Report by Antique

Hashers gathered at the Buffalo Bar for our weekly Pattaya Hash Run. Departing between heavy rain showers. And no pick up at Tesco’s we proceeded to the A Site – Kho Mei Kaew. There the Hares had managed to find a site with chicane entry between rain ravines.

Luckily SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD took on the role of traffic warden to assist the unwary drivers to get safely in. until leaving when the lead baht taxi managed to drop 2 feet into a ravine. As always well fueled hashers where able to lift the baht taxi out.

The circle was brought together by the GM in the some what small entrenched circle. Only one set of new shoes could be found on visitor ETOOFALI who being a visitor thought she could be excused. NO WAY.  However honourable English Gent ANTIQUE took the Christening Down Down for her.

The Hares VV, DEL BOY and TWO TIME came in to the circle to give the info for the run.

  1. Beware of other paper Including wide paper (this sounds promising ???)
  2. Beware Cobras – do not chase or catch.

So with no further ado the runners where pointed up the slope to look for the trail. Quickly picked up by the front runners to clear the Circle. The walkers followed led by hare DEL BOY to stop after 50 metres to watch as the runners on a long loop.

Came to a 10 metre rope hill climb. This was great as walkers cheered on the front runners. Brought back memories from long ago of a visit by a USA Battle FleetUS Marines, Pattaya Hashers went to Sattahip for a run on the Thai Military Assault Course involving rope climb, rope bridges, inflatable assault boats and running. AIRHEAD I am sure remembers well.

Runners and walkers  joined together for a short way before coming to the runners/walkers split. Regretably I no longer keep up with the runners (or luckily today) so have to rely on a secret interview with a front runner. He told me it was a true f***-**…over paper, back checks leading to bad checks. The end result was the runners coming in all ways but on paper. KIDNEY WIPER, DIRT LOONEY and GI JOE making it back well in to the circle.

One unfortunate Belgian going Rambo and wanting or not to stay overnight in the jungle. Beware if a hare goes on a trail to  direct. There is likely to be problems. (Recollect TOSSA‘s run a few weeks ago). Is it time for Light Coloured paper to avoid part of the problem?

SIR WILLY started the circle with his customary Raffle which he tirelessly organizes each Monday and helps him to bemoan the Hash Finances to encourage the extraction of bahts from the poor Hashers. The lucky winners I believe were:

  1. ETOOFALI — RiceCooker
  2. LIBERACE — ????
  3. LOVELY LADY — Red Wine
  4. PHANTOM — Vodka
  5. ARSE VAN HOLE — Shirt (non retunrnable)
  6. TESTICLES — Wine Cooler
  7. FRODO — Cat

All to be given a Down Down as well.

AIRHEAD gave the Hares an icing and I thought left them off lightly for the run.  Maybe he got a freebie at the BBQ or had a promise on so needed to be away quick.

Hares having NO song had to be helped by BURL IVES with a song. This was “My Sister Belinda” with a Scottish Slant but good for a lot of the Hash to join in.

Hash Trash was presented to visitor ETOOFALI who thought she had got away with it but for squealer ANTIQUE. She was duly presented with the Trash Hat on the ice along with ANTIQUE for being a squealer.

With the time getting late and like me going on a bit the Circle sang the Hash Hymn to go to Nicky’s Bar, the On-On Bar who supports the Hash with terrific hosptality.

On-On!  Antique

Next week’s scribe is to be announced

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—– STATS REPORT —–

Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.

Total Runners This Week – 65

Hashers Present Last Week – 49

19 ARSE BANDIT; 35 ARSE VAN HOLE; 605 BALL RINGER; 387 BELL END; 125 BEN 10; 206 BEVERLY HILLS PINK COCK; 35 BOB SNOT HERE; 110 BURL IVES; 78 DEL BOY; 91 DIRT LOONEY; 1398 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 632 G.I. JOE; 18 GADDAFI’S BRIDE; 12 GADDAFI’S HUSBAND; 296 GANGREEN; 766 GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER; 99 GOLDEN RIVET; 38 HARBOR WHORE; 699 LADY FLIPPER; 341 LIBERACE; 431 LONE WOLF; 131 LOST CAUSE; 26 MAYO QUEEN; 158 MENSTRUAL DISORDER; 4 MINNIE DISORDER; 9 MINOR DISORDER; 108 MISS USE ME; 747 MRS. HEAD; 185 NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER; 4 NINJA PRINCESS; 4 NOISY QUEEN; 51 PHANTOM; 32 PINK DOLPHIN; 88 PRINCESS BUM BOY; 45 RAT VON KIEL; 229 SEAL SUCKER; 4 SILENT PRINCESS; 694 SIR ARSE-A-HOLIC; 721 SIR FREE WILLY; 719 SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD; 883 SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD; 439 SQUEEZE MY TUBE; 55 TELLY TUBBY; 43 THE WIZARD; 213 TURD BURGLAR; 199 TWO TIME; 54 UNSTABLE LOAD; 813 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 331 WANK-KING’S WANKER

Returners – 11

143 ANTIQUE; ; 73 BAHT BUS GESTAPO; 516 DUCHESS TADPOLE; 16 FRODO; 42 FUNNY BUNNY; 13 LOVELY LADY; 164 PINKABOO; 254 REAR GUNNER; 157 RUNNING BARE; 61 SLACK VAGINA; 73 TESTICLES

Visitors (PH3 Total Runs) – 4

2 Noy Tomlinson – Bangkok Hash, Thailand
5 LUCAN MADE ME CUM – Bangkok Hash, Thailand
1 THE COUNT – Jakarta Hash, Indonesia
4 ETOOFALI – Kampala H3, Uganda

Virgins – 1

Ma Boonsari

Leavers – 0

~ none this week ~

Anniversaries – 0

~ none this week ~

Hash Name Events – 3

Gloria Van Hove was given the New Hash Name NINJA PRINCESS.
Chonticha Majan was given the New Hash Name NOISY QUEEN.
Ben Majan was given the New Hash Name SILENT PRINCESS.

Saints and Sinners – 1

Hash Trash – ETOOFALI – Littering the A-Site.

Birthdays – 0

~ none this week ~


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